"If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?" never sounded so sincere.
Same for "Are you from Tennessee? Cause you're the only '10' I see!" and yes, even "It's a good thing that I have my library card, cause I am totally checking you out!"
Even the most cringy of cringe-inducing pick-up lines sound downright suave and chivalrous next to the nonsense some guy in Japan was pulling off in one of the most comically (and criminally) misguided ways to ever meet women.
The pick-up line of choice for Yoshihito Harada? "Looks like you’ve got a flat. Let me fix it for you." Which almost sounds nice, until you find out the reason our damsel in distress has a flat tire in the first place is because Harada allegedly slashed it -- for the sole purpose of later striking up a conversation with the victim.
And he did this roughly 1,000 times. To meet roughly 1,000 women.
According to Asian news site RocketNews24, the tire-slashing lothario has been charged in connection with five of the incidents and told the court, "It’s true, I did it." The 25-year-old businessman's undoing was a conversation between two women who discussed both recently having flat tires. And, wouldn't you know it, both were quickly approached by a man offering assistance.
Harada allegedly used screwdrivers and other sharp objects to pierce the victims' tires*. When asked about other attacks beyond the five for which he's charged, Harada's attorney reportedly said "There were about 1,000, weren't there?" No word on whether they resulted in a single date.
* And their hearts. Awww.
Follow Jonathan Anker on Twitter @JonFromHLN