Well then. Washington, D.C. Mayor Vincent Gray minced no words when he shared his feelings on the Redskins' team name. The 'Skins, though hailed as the district's football team, are actually relegated to a stadium in sort-of nearby Landover, Maryland. But Gray says, if they ever want to play inside the Beltway, they have to get rid of their controversial name:
“I think that if they get serious with the team coming back to Washington, there’s no doubt there’s going to have to be a discussion about that,” he told The Washington Post. "And of course the team is going to have to work with us around that issue.”
Bleacher Report: D.C. Mayor: 'Redskins' is racist. It's Time for a Change'
Let's try on a few of the less-offensive names and logos for the boys in burgundy and gold. (We're gunning for the Washington MANuments.)
Could totally, maybe work:
The Washington Braves (same logo): Atlanta can't hog all of the non-NFL Native American terms, and they would get to keep their emblem!
The Washington Skins (same logo): Just shorten it. It's no worse than the 49ers.
The Washington Federals (a shirtless Alexander Hamilton): Nationals, Capitals, Federals. Eh? Nifty little trio, right?
On the table:
The Washington Whips (a whip, naturally): Like Majority whip. Or the scary cracking sort.
The Washington Founders (John Adams wearing the Declaration of Independence): This is totally D.C.
The Washington Stags (a scared-looking deer): There are a lot of deer in Maryland and Virginia. Like, a lot. They are very dangerous.
The Washington Warriors (someone with a musket and a bayonet): Paying homage to the armed forces without totally insulting them.
The Washington Senators (Majority Leader Harry Reid in a baseball hat): So we steal old baseball names. So what.
The Washington Captains (a boat): There are lots of boats around D.C., and D.C. runs this game. So. Captains.
The Washington RG IIIs: *SOB*
The Washington Cherry Blossoms: "The Blossoms are BLOOMING on the field this year!" Oh, it's all too perfect.
The Washington Congressmen: Their logo can be a tiny briefcase.
The Washington Pandas: The other reason people love DC.
The Washington MANuments: When the MANuments win, America wins.